Thursday, September 08, 2011

Ups and downs

I just realised you can suddenly be very happy at one moment, then utterly sad the next. that your words, not matter how innocuous it may be, can just devastate the emotional state on another person dearest to you.

And the same goes the other way. I was so so extremely relaxed and happy today, after a very smooth-flowing workday creating some passing testbanches. Then after typing a very stupid comment on facebook, my world just came crashing down after my dearest took offence so badly on what I jsut said. I haven't felt this happy and stress free in a long long long while, not since last year, not since my house renovations completed, not since along time i can remember. I finally managed to complete everything in my checklist, and i really mean everything. with just a code review and a pesky SPR from the apps team to bug me for the next 2 days. then, I will be free and get my long deserved holiday with you.

But alas, it was a short lived one. Now I am wallowing in self pity and remorse, wishing so much I could take back my words, and make everything better and perfect again. How I wished we are not far apart, and I can just hug you and everything will be so much better. I am not good with words, really don't know how to tell you that I really did not mean what I said. That I didnt know the hell you've been thru today, and my words was just the exact tipping point for you to boil over.

So with all my heart, I hope you will be able to be happy again tomorrow. then all of these will just be a storm in the past.

#update:- I am happy again now. my baby is talking to me again! :)